What a Wonderful Animosity
by Dramatic Insanity
Summary: Since Skipper won't be his friend, Julien becomes close to someone else in need of one. Skipper is far from pleased with this development. Hans convinces Julien that he's been wronged, and it motivates him to stand up for himself, tearing penguin and lemur further apart. Skipper/Julien (Skiju)


**A/N: **Around 12k words… haha… this got much longer than I expected. Wild how the muse can run away with itself...

This story begins near the end and after the episode Best Foes (because I'm obsessed with that episode), with a bit of canon divergence and minor extra scenes. so if you haven't seen it in a while, I suggest a refresher unless you have a crisp memory.

The POV switches between Julien and Skipper, with it jumping to the other one with each "chapter" - Except the first "chapter" which contains both. I'm too lazy to actually post this in separate chapters, but what would've been chapters are marked.

Furthermore, there is adult content (maybe high teen-ish, depending on what an individual is comfortable with) in the first and later chapters, but they aren't very graphic or numerous. This story is pretty heavy with introspection and angst in some parts, as I lean a bit harder than usual on the "obfuscating stupidity" trope that I headcanon for King Julien. Take heed... and please enjoy.

* * *

**CHAPTER ONE**

**(Julien)**

"I love you, man!"

Julien's heart rate accelerates. This is like a dream. Never have four words sounded so sweet. The taste of strawberry ice cream does not remotely compare to hearing those words in Skipper's drawl.

He slightly laughs, disbelief caught in his throat. "Say _what_ now?"

"I love you!" Not breaking eye contact, Skipper elaborates, "_Come on_. Your mangled language, your party attitude, your dance-like girations? I _dig it_ _all_."

Julien bites down on his lip in shock, as his muscles contract, destroying the ice cream in his paw. He barely notices the sticky substance dribbling through his fingers. He could have sworn those were things that got on Skipper's nerves, in the bad way.

"You -" For a moment, he couldn't remember how to breathe. "You _like_ me?"

It flips a switch in his mind. He can't do it, he can't give it up yet even though it's not real.

"I love you man," Skipper emphatically repeats. "What kind of sad mixed up world would this be if I didn't?"

If that wasn't somewhat painful proof of reality's truth. From what Julien could tell, Skipper wasn't usually his biggest fan. They've had moments, but it always seems to revert back to the status quo. It is a sad and mixed up world, indeed.

"I change my mind," Julien cries anyway, hopeful to hold on to this for as long as he can, "Penguins!"

He spins Skipper around and points Kowalski out, just in case Skipper doesn't look at him directly. Skipper doesn't hesitate to get rid of him. They are left blissfully alone on the table. Skipper turns to him, eyes bright in the darkness. He hovers, leaning closer. For a second, Julien thinks they might kiss. He tilts his head and fights back a grin. However, Skipper blinks and puts his flippers on his hips. He gives Julien a smile. He's readably friendly, nothing romantic in his eyes or body language. Skipper has never been the most open, but he would probably be more obvious with his friends.

Skipper doesn't like him the way he wants. It isn't a dream. This is a nightmare. He's made a mistake, but that doesn't mean he can't still milk it.

"Well, I'd better lock them up before they cause us anymore trouble," Skipper says.

"Yeah," Julien softly agrees, his mood sinking like a boat riddled with holes.

"Don't you worry. We'll have that frown upside-down in no time." Skipper pats his arm and hops off the table. Julien follows him as he rounds up the penguins and drags them off to lock them away.

He plans to ship them off. Julien feels a wave of guilt. He'll definitely have to put a stop to this before anything regrettable happens. There's no telling whether the effects on Skipper will ever wear off on their own. If they did, he would be angry with Skipper for sabotaging Kowalski. If he even remembers.

Would he remember seeing Julien in a good light? He fears going back again too, but he knows it would be the right thing. The right thing is usually hard… and annoying. He distracts himself by throwing a two-buddy party, par for the course.

Then Hans has to show up. If pressed, Julien wouldn't deny his jealousy. Skipper and Hans appear to have a special connection. His voice grates on Julien, and were he a more violent person he might have violent thoughts.

He informs Hans of the situation. He hopes it would be enough to send him away, but not so much. The fight escalates.

"Skipper is _my_ palsy-walsy!"

"Shut… _up_." Julien can't grasp a better comeback. He's too frustrated that Hans is cutting into his quality time with Skipper. It's on a limit. He steals Rico's saw, not quite knowing what he might do with it. Maybe it will just scare Hans, by him threatening to saw Skipper in half.

He rudely throws Skipper, slamming him into the cage. He was obviously aiming for Julien, but he failed and hurt him instead. Julien starts to think he might just use the saw on Hans himself. He remembers that it would probably result in blood - and Julien isn't one to purposefully cause serious harm to another, in most circumstances.

Hans whips out a fish, giving Julien another idea. Mort is nearby, since Skipper was packing up everyone to be shipped. He mostly holds Mort forward to block the other's attacks. He has to bide his time. The time is up. The penguins will do their thing like they always do. It's hopeless otherwise, he just has to concede.

"Hans!"

"Uh… palsy-walsy?"

Relief and disappointment rush over Julien. A confusing conflict, just like his relationship with Skipper. He peeks from behind Mort to see Skipper preparing to give Hans the smackdown. He drops Mort so they can he can watch.

"Get him Skipper!"

Skipper raises his flipper, then catches himself half-way. His brow seems to furrow in bafflement. He shakes his head and returns his attention to taking Hans down. It eventually leads into tying him to a rocket and sending him off. Julien stays at a distance. He observes Skipper carelessly ripping the photo in half, which makes him a little glad. At the same time it worries him. Does Skipper have the same amount of disregard for their temporary alliance? Julien is grateful Skipper didn't take any photos with _him_. He wouldn't have been able to handle watching him tear them apart without a second thought.

His legs can't hold him. He sinks to the ground, heartbroken. While he does want Skipper romantically, having him as a friend would be nice too. Maurice and Mort are loyal to fault, but it isn't the same. He wants a friend who doesn't see him as king, and Skipper for certain doesn't respect his royalty. Though it gets on his nerves sometimes, a part of him enjoys that aspect.

Skipper approaches him. Julien tenses, not able to guess how he might respond.

"Buck up, Ringtail."

He probably expects Julien to just get over it. Like he does everything else - or so it appears. Julien's eyes widen as Skipper continues speaking, soft and patient, which is unusual.

"This could be a chance for us to start another chapter in our sometimes rocky relationship, maybe… learn to see each other's point of view and work together."

His flippers slide out, his stance open. His eyes are hopeful with a direct gaze. It makes heat pool in Julien's stomach. It boils with emotions he couldn't describe.

Julien drums his fingers on his knee. "You really think so?"

"I don't see why not. Starting fresh tomorrow! I need a good night's sleep after - after all of that," Skipper says. Julien nods.

Moving slow and careful, he hugs Skipper. He returns the hug, surprising Julien. One of his flippers rubs Julien's back a few times. He melts into the touch and briefly rests his head on top of Skipper's. He glances at the other penguins. He notices Private, Rico, and Kowalski sharing knowing smiles. What are they seeing that he does not?

Private calls, "Alright then, Skipper?"

Skipper suddenly jerks away from him as though burned. "Let's turn in boys."

He gives Julien a wave goodbye. His focus lingers for a moment as Julien leaves for his habitat. His heart is caught somewhere in his throat, and it's difficult to stay grounded.

**(Skipper)**

Skipper can't believe what happened. He feels like it was a fever dream, all but confessing his feelings to Julien, dancing with him, watching Julien and Hans fight over him. It's kind of hilarious. Skipper chokes down his laughter, tossing a cautious eye at the other penguins. He had unrequited feelings for Hans once, who wanted Skipper only as his friend in crime. He's still uncertain whether Hans was manipulating him in Denmark, or if he had no clue to the depth of skipper's affection.

History is repeating itself. His love life is a sham, a travesty. Most had friendship as a foundation, but what good did that do him? Love turned to hate with the sting of betrayal in some cases, leaving a bitter taste in his beak. His penguin brothers sufficiently fulfill that role, he trusts and loves them. He's willing to give it a shot, befriending Julien. He can bury these feelings. Julien was genuinely upset. If Julien can make an effort, he can compromise.

Despite his claim that he needs rest, he barely gets any rest. He spends most of the night staring at the concrete above him and thinking about Julien. Sleep's gradual embrace creeps onto him in a strangely menacing way.

_The morning brings a perkier lemur into their base. _

"_Hello neighbors!"_

_Skipper is impressed at how quickly and seamlessly his boys vacate the premises at the sound of Julien's enthusiastic lilt. He's irked to be left alone. He wonders if that's the intention. Julien's arm slings around him._

"_I guess it's just me and my BFF," Julien says, following with a grin that makes Skipper's stomach flip. _

_He wants to hate the way he leans into Julien's touch. Before he can lose control, Skipper shrugs him off. It reminds him exactly how difficult this could be. It doesn't feel right, to lead Julien on with an omission of truth. _

"_I don't get how you're so insistent on being great friends," Skipper protests. "I've never expressed interest in friendship."_

_His head feels fuzzy. A walk should clear it. Suddenly, Julien is holding his hand. They're beneath a tree in the park. The walk went by so fast, must be due to Julien distracting him. _

_Julien leans close and whispers, "My love for you is like the deepest ocean."_

_Skipper mutters Julien's name. As the lemur leans further, so does he, and they kiss. Julien breaks free and runs, laughing. Skipper chases him._

"_Where are you going? We were having a moment!"_

_Julien contests, "You didn't think I'd make it so easy did you?"_

_When he catches up to Julien, he wraps his flipper around his hand. They trek back to the zoo. The base is still empty. He stares at himself in the mirror. _

_His reflection speaks, challenging him, "Are you really good enough? A good enough leader? A good enough penguin? What makes you think you deserve any of this?"_

_He shakes his head, confused. Julien strokes his feathers. His fingers find the perfect spot on his back, where it's tight from stress. "Don't worry, silly penguin, I am here."_

_The touching continues, until it spirals out of control. Skipper watches himself in the mirror, as Julien expresses his love from behind. He's moving inside Skipper, and Skipper is enjoying every second, every second of his heated caresses. He groans, shuddering as Julien's damp lips journey along his neck. He gasps as Julien picks up his speed._

"_Yes… yes, Ringtail, oh Ringtail, don't stop… don't you dare"_

"_I will give you everything my bossy little bird."_

"_Bring it on…"_

Kowalski's voice shatters the bubble of his pleasure. "Skipper? Are you alright, sir?"

Skipper blinks, twice, hard. He finds himself laying in his bunk. He turns to see the other penguins staring at him. Rico is smiling in an odd manner. Kowalski is looking at him with narrowed eyes and starts to examine him. Private just appears worried. He pushes past the haze of tiredness.

"Boys? What's going on?"

"You slept in, Skipper. That's not like you," Private informs him.

Skipper slowly finds the rest of his voice. "I - I had trouble falling asleep last night. I didn't even - it seemed so real I thought -"

With a hideous sinking feeling, Skipper realizes there's no longer any escape. He had a romantic, sensual _dream_ about Julien. _He's in love with him. _

He stalls. Kowalski fills in, "You were dreaming. Something about… Julien, or as you call him, Ringtail. I'm not sure what was going on, but you sounded distressed."

"I think you said something like… _Ringtail, don't you dare_… maybe," Private carefully tacks on.

Skipper realizes he's still clinging to his pillow. There's a spot of drool on it. He rolls it to the other side before the others can see. It's a good thing pillows can't talk. He sighs and climbs out of the bunk. He saunters over and starts the coffee.

"It was remarkably vivid. It's still pretty clear. Now that I think about it, there were some missing pieces."

Out of the blue, Kowalski proclaims, "Then… oh it must be. My dreamulator is a success!"

Kowalski wilts underneath Skipper's stink eye. He continues, "I've been working on a device that enhances dream retention and lucid dreaming capabilities. It wasn't supposed to broadcast but I suppose I might have… accidentally… perhaps, you were simply more receptive due to external factors that -"

"Stop rambling."

"Yes, sir."

"I want a lid on this thing, pronto."

"Yes, sir."

Kowalski scurries into the lab. Skipper breathes another sigh, this time with relief. As an afterthought he shouts, "Drills in an hour!"

"Got it!"

Skipper watches television until then, even stooping to watching Lunacorns with Private. Anything to try to keep his mind off of - _someone_. No one special, in particular, no sir. Drills proceed smoothly, and there's no sign of that someone.

His luck doesn't hold out. Julien happens to pass by.

"Hello, stinky fish birds. I'm on my way to do kingly things that are kingly secret," Julien says, followed by a shush gesture with his finger.

"You have something secret," Kowalski deadpans.

"Yes, you penguins aren't the only ones around here with secrets you know - I have my own too! And you can't be knowing them."

Kowalski hums, obviously not agreeing with that last assessment. Julien's eyes land on them, and Skipper simply forgets everything he's learned in his entire life.

"Hi, Skipper."

"Ring - Juli - king - don't we all have secrets? Like my grandma's secret sweet potato bake recipe. But listen, I won't have fancy pants lemurs copying our shtick. Ringadingding?"

Skipper glances away from Julien's sunset eyes with no idea what he just said. Julien slides past him. Skipper forces himself not to quiver at the glide of Julien's silky fur across his feathers. It's an uncomfortable reminder of their intimacy in the dream. Julien points accusingly at Kowalski.

"Look at him. You are doing da breaking of his brainy parts!"

"Me?!"

"You with all your mad science-magic, yes!"

"That's preposterous!"

Julien moves his hand to his hip. "I will be the one who is posturing."

"That doesn't make any s -"

"Enough," Skipper commands, aimed at Kowalski. He gestures for the boys to follow him as he slips away to the base. He ignores Julien's soft call after him. It almost sounds concerned, but that's impossible. He only cares about himself. Most of the time. There were exceptions.

Which don't matter. Skipper has to distract himself from things. A few beautiful days pass where he manages to avoid Julien and subsequently making a worse fool of himself.

* * *

**CHAPTER TWO**

**(Julien)**

Julien slumps on his throne, not feeling particularly regal. It's raining, soaking his fur, yet he doesn't care at the moment. He watches the penguins training in the downpour, a sense of loneliness overtaking him. No matter how hard he tries, Skipper keeps pushing him away. What is the point of railing against a brick wall? It leads to disappointment, day after day. It isn't just Skipper.

Nobody in the zoo really likes him. Madagascar elected a secondary leader, and last he checked, they barely need him. For as many good things he did, he also screwed up a lot. He glances at Maurice and Mort. They love him, in a way, but he wonders how far they would've tolerated him before he got the crown. Mort didn't pay him much attention before his uncle's abdication, and Maurice was once _paid_. Sure, he claims and has shown it is more than a job, for a while now. Julien can't help wondering if Maurice would have given him the time of day, had that never happened, or had Julien not been a prince. Julien saved his life as a baby, merely out of his natural curiosity and adventurousness, but Maurice didn't remember that.

Before Maurice, Julien was a self-centered kid who no one _actually_ liked as a person or wanted to be around. He knows this from the reunion, feels it in his bones still. He was beloved after he proved himself as a king, but before that? _Nothing. _

Would he have even left Madagascar if he were a prince, or somewhere below that? He doubts it. He probably would've gotten into a bad situation and died way before that happened. Maurice and Clover constantly saved his ass, and protected him from himself. His own uncle might have gotten tired of him eventually and offed him, if he never had a reason to abdicate.

Julien rubs his temples. All the thinking of _what-ifs_ is certainly giving him a headache. He hates thinking to much, he likes to think with his booty and his heart. His brain just can't take all this heavy duty lifting.

"Maurice! Where is my smoothie?"

"I'm making it!"

"Well, be hurrying up!"

He doesn't blame any of them. Sometimes, he can't even stand himself. When he tried to be nice, everyone still hated it. What else can he do?

The rain slows to a stop. Julien sighs. "Can I have a towel as well, please?"

He hears Maurice mutter to Mort, "Did he just say please?"

He rolls his eyes and rests his cheek on his fist. He can't be nice, no one believes it. They could also believe he is up to something. His parents called compassion and generosity staples of weakness, that got you eaten by the fossa. From his uncle, it was nice guys finish last, early bird gets the worm, that kind of stuff. He used to act against these philosophies, for a little while, as a child. That is, until he found out his family was punishing _others_ for his softness. It didn't come from within, according to them, it was the influence of the weak-minded peasants.

He was poorly homeschooled until his adolescence, then he had to cheat off Maurice because his academics were lacking. He didn't make an attempt to properly catch up, because his teachers were bribed to go easy on him. He didn't know it at the time, but with hindsight, he knows now that he didn't try harder because of the coddling.

"Did I? Well, I must be catching a cold to be speaking stupidy things like that. Ignore that slip up, pl - pleb."

"I'm your royal advisor, how am I a -"

"Shush your mango hole, Maurice! You are not _technically_ royalty, and have no other title, so it is true isn't it."

Maurice glares at him. He slams the smoothie cup on the counter. "Smoothie's done. If you can unglue your royal behind from your throne and get it, be my guest."

He storms off. Julien doesn't bother looking where. Frowning, he climbs down from the throne to get his smoothie. He also finds a towel for himself and scrubs at his fur in angry, jerking motions. It'll be messy, but he doesn't care at the moment.

He hates the way he treats Maurice. He doesn't deserve it for all his loyalty and friendship. In truth, it's gotten worse since they got to the zoo. In this lax environment, compared to the wilds of Madagascar, Julien at first slipped in his facade too much. Maurice started to worry that he was homesick, or _sick_-sick. Julien _got sick_ of being doted on in this manner, so he increased his mask by double.

It was a mistake. Possibly, Maurice would've realized that Julien wanted a fresh start. That Julien, for the first time in forever, was trying to be true to his real self, locked deep down.

At this point, everyone would definitely think he's gone off the deep end if he lets it slip by a fraction. It can happen around Maurice, it's a practiced move to cover his tracks, but the suspicious penguins? He has to do his level best to throw them off the scent. The moment they spot his weakness, he's done. Everything will crash down.

Skipper might find out what he means to Julien. How he could be so in love with someone who probably wouldn't cry if he was roadkill, Julien has no idea. Maybe he's just that messed up. He grips his smoothie cup tightly. He doesn't feel like drinking it, but he would hate for Maurice's efforts to be in vain. If he tried to give it to someone else, they wouldn't trust him.

He hears an odd sound. He strains his hearing and tilts his head this way and that. Then, he hears it clearly. Someone is crying. He rushes in that direction, taking his smoothie along. He discovers Hans, the penguin-like bird with a more prominent beak. He's sitting against the wall, sobbing into his wings. Julien twitches. He dislikes Hans, who he had to compete with for Skipper. He's a bit foggy on the details though. He doesn't know what Hans' goals truly are, or about the past between him and Skipper.

He approaches. There's a hitch in the crying. Does Hans already sense his presence?

"Sk-Skipsy? Have you come to comfort me after all this -" He looks up at Julien with eyes full of hope. His expression instantly falls to disappointment, not an unfamiliar sight to Julien.

"Oh. It's you. The palsy-walsy that Skipper would prefer."

"Technically, I took my chance while you were gone, findy-keeper's style," Julien responds. Hans sniffles and crosses his wings.

Julien continues, "We are not really friends. Skipper's mind was reversed by a wackadoo backwards magicky-machine thing. He thought we were both his friends."

"So you're… enemies?"

"I am guessing. I thought he - I thought - but I was being stupidy and wrong. He probably doesn't even see me as an actual nemesis, just - just a nuisance. The fly in his soup."

Hans appears baffled. "Well, you had me fooled even before that. I - in fact I wondered from my spying if you are something more. I was happy to see him move on."

Julien perks. "Move on from what?"

"From _whom_. From me. He was - he was - in love with me. I am ashamed to admit I took advantage of it for personal gain. I regret it. I still wanted to be friends, but we did not share the same beliefs and goals, so separate ways we went. I dream of it…"

"I do not care about your dreams," Julien barks, surprising even himself with the harshness. Hans flinches.

"You are protective of Skipsy, no? It confuses me greatly that he does apparently not share your - ah - passion. I would swoon, to be so adored."

"I am not worthy of his feelings anyway," Julien mumbles. He averts his gaze to the ground.

"Oh." Hans pauses. "Funny enough, neither am I. When he confessed to me his affections, I told him that he wasted his time, that he was foolish. In hindsight, I realize he took it the wrong way, and I hurt him more."

Suddenly, Hans notices what he's holding. "Is zat a beverage of the icy cold fruit mush? I have not had one in such a long time. No such luxuries at Hoboken, even if you are willing to be the thieving and conniving sort."

"You are not?"

"No! Denmark was just a misunderstanding. I took things too far, but I got in too deep to turn back, and now forever I have gained Skipper's resentment and ire."

"Skipper is always irritated with me," Julien remarks. He passes the smoothie to Hans. "However, I am not lighting the bulb as to the exact reason. He just sees most of the bad in me, and none of the good, I am thinking."

Hans stares at the smoothie in disbelief. "You don't want this?"

"I - I am not in the mood."

Hans takes a sip. "This is very good! Did you make it?"

"No, my royal advisor did. But I was mean to him and lost my appetite."

"You are so kind in giving this to me, even if you don't want it, there are those who would keep things for themselves or _no one_. Why not be _nice _to him?"

"He will think I'm crazy."

Hans laughs. "Once you are pegged by people one way, it is hard to change their minds! They say things about first impressions, but even if it is good, the moment you put a toe out of line, that can turn around in a heartbeat."

"Don't I know it."

Hans raises the smoothie cup. "Cheers. They may hate us, but we have got them beat. They will never be on the level of loathing we have for ourselves."

Julien nods. Julien does make efforts to love himself, enough to make up for all the people who don't. However, underneath he still feels frustrated that he is who he is. He sits beside Hans and leans slightly on him. Hans doesn't tense at the contact, push him away, yell, or otherwise seem uncomfortable. He smiles and takes another, longer sip. He is glad someone can enjoy the beverage. He closes his eyes.

Could he finally have a friend?

He knows he shouldn't completely trust Hans, despite his claims that he's not as bad as others have made him out to be. On the other hand, he desperately wants someone to relate to, someone to see and accept the real Julien.

Hans is the one to venture, "Do you want to be palsies, Mister King Julien?"

"You can just call me Julien."

"So does that mean -"

"Yes, let us be sailing the ship of friends."

"Woo-hoo!"

Julien whoops along with him, and Hans raises his wing to slap it on Julien's palm.

* * *

**CHAPTER THREE**

**(Skipper)**

As drills come to a close, Skipper decides to take a peek at the lemur habitat. Julien had kept to himself lately, which is odd. He probably shouldn't jinx it, but the idea that Julien has grown wise is too good to be true.

He's met with an even stranger and unexpected sight. Hans is there. He and Julien are dancing to the music, oblivious to his presence. Maurice is cleaning nearby, looking as bewildered as Skipper feels.

His second emotion is the sting of betrayal. One of his fellow zoo members, his acquaintance, who he reluctantly considers his friend, consorting with his enemy? Number two on his nemesis list no less? Julien gets on his nerves in multiple and confusing ways, yet this is a new low. What fresh hell _is_ this?

Skipper glowers at Hans and enters the habitat. It's possible Julien is another victim of his cruel manipulation.

"Ringtail. _What_ are you doing?"

Julien pauses. He doesn't start immediately acting like an eager puppy toward Skipper, raising a red flag.

"I'm dancing, silly."

"Why, does it look like we are doing something else, like making lemonade," Hans chimes in. Skipper ignores him. Hans idly adds, "Actually, I like the sound of that."

"Hans is bad news, an enemy of myself and this zoo. He's a felon and villain! Why do you appear buddy-buddy? Did he mess with you? Make some kind of offer?"

"Nothing of the sort. We have an emotionally connecting bond," Julien explains, but it really clarifies little. Skipper finally advances on Hans.

"Stay away from him," Skipper growls.

"Now you care Skipsy, when someone has taken his attention off you? Threatens your undeserved place in his life? How selfish of you, my old fr -"

"Don't call me that. You have no right."

"It's not my fault you have not moved on, nor is it his. Why should Julien bear such punishment? You should not make him suffer because of _your_ problems."

Skipper steps back. He notices Julien is peering slightly over him, rather than at him.

"What on Earth are you talking about?" He can't take it anymore. Throat tight, Skipper confesses, "I don't know what you mean. He likes me. I like him. Friends watch out for each other, and I don't want you tricking him. He's gullible."

"I… appreciate your confidence in me," Julien remarks, his voice harsh and dry. "Any other insights you have on my dummyness? I am an adult making my own decisions."

His scathing tone is a shock. Skipper can't recall the last time Julien spoke to him that way.

Hans says, "You are in pain, I hurt you that's true. But you are not better to lay your frustrations on others."

Skipper shakes his head. He points his flipper at Hans' chest and claims, "There's something fishy here, and I'm going to figure out your scheme."

He flips onto the wall and out of the pen. He hears Hans comment, "Thought he would never leave. What a party poopsy eh?"

Skipper will get to the bottom of this. It seems like Hans is trying to turn him against them, not that he imagines it would have much of an effect. Julien is a bringer of chaos, though usually not fully on purpose. He's harmless at the core, he's not a genius or fighter, not cruel or vindictive. He doesn't deserve to go through what Skipper went through at the wings of Hans. Never again.

He gathers the penguins. "Okay boys, here are the stakes: Hans is in the zoo. He is either trying to convert allies into foes, or get under my skin and throw me off guard. Whatever his motivation, he has to be stopped. I can't let him hurt anyone else. Operation: Flip Flop is a go."

Private raises his flipper.

"Yes?"

"Why do you call it Flip Flop?"

"I will not be taking questions at this time." In reality, he's not sure. It just popped into his head. He based it loosely on Hans' bizarre effect on Julien's behavior.

"But -"

"That's final."

Private nods and lowers his flipper. "You're the leader."

"Kowalski, options?"

Kowalski pulls out his notepad. "We could…. Send him to the moon?"

"Too risky. And expensive."

Several extreme and impractical options later, there's a winner.

"If his goal is to change the minds and hearts of our allies… we must beat him at his own game. You have to reaffirm their loyalty."

"That sounds easier said than done," Skipper responds. "But I think you're onto something."

"Out of curiosity, who is he trying to win over?"

"Right now, his primary focus seems to be King Julien."

Rico says, "Raa? Why 'im for? 'Lien's no threat."

Kowalski and Private share a concerned glance, apparently having a wordless conversation without cluing in Skipper. He taps his foot.

"Do you think… you might be blowing this out of proportion? It's worth considering they might just be friends, nothing to do with you," Kowalski suggests.

"Preposterous." He searches his brain, but Skipper can't come up with a fair argument for that. He recognizes that he's jumping the shark, but he also believes it's important to stay on top of this. "If Hans isn't scheming now, he will be eventually when he finds the right opportunity."

"Still, I think -"

"_Can it_, soldier. I'll be taking your advice, and the first phase of Operation: Flip Flop will be to discern how this absurd so-called friendship is existing in the first place, and perhaps find the root cause of Julien's shifting loyalties."

"Alright." Kowalski looks lost. Skipper can't imagine why. The path forward is clear to him.

"So you want to hang out with Julien and get to know him," Private surmises. Who asked him to be Captain Obvious, anyway.

"Yes… what is your point?"

Private giggles. "Well, I hope you have fun cementing your friendship, but I think you ought to leave the rest of us out of it."

Skipper's eye twitches. He grabs his coffee cup and sets it down hard under the coffee maker, and turns it on. He announces, "If none of you want to take this _seriously, _then I suppose I will. I can handle it myself."

"Okay."

He's becoming irritated. At this point, he would actually rather be joining Julien in that barely coordinated, freestyle thing he calls dancing. It occurs to him he's not certain Julien will _want_ to see him. He'll need a peace offering of some sort.

The answer is staring him in the beak.

He should challenge Hans to a dance-off. Julien lives and breathes dancing, it seems the best immediate way to get in his good graces. If he can beat Hans, that might suggest to Julien's feeble mind he's not so great after all. Things can go back to normal and make sense again.

He takes off to the habitat. Just the sight of Hans makes his eye twitch, and he wants to punch something with full force. They're reclined and chatting casually. Skipper waits, but they fail to notice him.

Skipper raises his voice to call, "Hans! I challenge you in the art of dance! The loser goes home and refrains from interacting with Julien."

"Pardon?" Hans walks over and examines him like he thinks Skipper has totally lost his mind. "Why for, Skipsy? You are interrupting Julien and I doing ze… 'hanging out' if you don't mind."

"I do mind," Skipper says tersely. It takes all of his composure to not snarl and spit in Hans' face like a tomcat in the middle of heat season.

_That's _a comparison. Would that make Julien the Dam in heat? _Surely not. _It's absurd, the track he's lately been travelling. Julien is certainly not a lady anyway, not that gender has ever stopped his competitive spirit. He soldiers on. He's made his proclamation, there's no backing out now. His gaze locates Julien. He's still laying back, sipping lemonade. His eyes are glued to Skipper.

Maurice and Mort wander over. Julien snaps out of it. He raises his arms. "With myself, Maurice, and Mort as de judges, let da battle of dancing commence!"

Skipper is taken aback when the music starts, Hans starts break-dancing. He didn't know that Hans had a musical bone in his body. It's a miscalculation. However, Skipper can't be counted out yet. Once Hans is done being mediocre, Skipper changes the tune and busts out his latin dance moves, as taught by his mother. It requires him to use Hans as a stand-in partner, but it's easy enough for him to carry the dance - as he did a similar thing when Julien was trying to get his groove back.

He's satisfied when Julien's jaw drops.

At the finish Julien says, "Skipper! You really are a dancer. That was… super hot sexy."

Skipper finds his cheeks heating at that. He's not unfamiliar with compliments, but hearing _that_ from Julien's mouth toward him is an experience. Hans glances at him in annoyance. Would he dare refute him? Several rounds later, Hans collapses from exhaustion. Skipper is winded, but he's triumphant. The votes are also in his favor.

"Don't give in so easily Julien," Hans says, unperturbed by his loss. "This is clearly a ploy to grab your attention, an empty gesture. If he was such an - admittedly - excellent dancer, why did he not dance with you before? Instead, he insults your interests, and expresses only anger and spite toward you for your love of music."

Skipper's stomach drops like an anvil in water. Horribly, Hans actually has a _point_. Skipper did plan this, mostly to shift Julien's attention from Hans. It's backfired. Was this part of the plan? Did he predict Skipper's actions?

"You are right." Julien frowns, and Skipper hates the sight. "Do you find me so unbearable that you would see me unhappy with no friends? I'm sure as soon as Hans was out of the picture, you wouldn't dance another step."

"Ringtail I -"

"_**DON'T CALL ME THAT!"**_

Skipper jerks away and bumps into the boombox. "I thought you… you never said anything about it before…"

"That was when I thought… no when I _hoped_ that you… cared about me on some level. I have been blinding my sight thingies to the truth. I am _nothing_ to you!" Julien clenches his fists, and his entire body seems to vibrate with unbridled animosity.

"That's not true. I do like you, Julien I -"

"It's not! It's not true! You're just a _**LIAR**_, Skipper, and I am done hearing it."

"But -"

"No, take your booty and leave my slice of kingdom."

Skipper can't see what else he can do in this situation. The guilt slams into him. He never gave Julien's party lifestyle half a chance because it wasn't close to _his_ style. He should've taken more of an interest in _Julien's_ life, for the sake of him, regardless of their conflicting attitudes. The heat grows, this time with something almost alien to him - _shame_. He also feels the familiar weight of emotion - he needs to leave before it spills over and exposes him further.

This might be a mistake from which he cannot recover. He has to face facts - he's going to lose Julien, and it's due to his own failure. Hans is just giving it the food, but the bubble he's been living it would've eventually been busted in another manner.

He takes a deep breath to keep the tears from falling. Julien is one of the few things, few people, who is capable of driving him to such an edge. "I'm. I'm sorry Julien. Whether you believe me or not… I do care about you. Not just because of _the code_. I want you to be happy, even if it's with my nemesis. I hope you can… forgive me, someday."

Julien crosses his arms and turns away from him.

"I wish I could hate you," Julien mumbles. "I can't because I love you. That is the worst trick of all."

Skipper winces. '_I love you', he said. _It burns. He remembers those words escaping his beak under the influence of Kowalski's twisted machine. Those words, feeling false at the time, yet true now and left unspoken. To speak them would rub salt in the wounds. It can't salvage their relationship. It seems like Julien's made up his mind.

The way it's phrased, Skipper's not certain whether Julien means platonic love or romantic love, but it hardly matters. He doesn't have to imagine the kind of torture it must bring.

"I'm sorry," Skipper says once more, feeling hollow. He hopes that his voice doesn't sound too choked up, he thinks his voice may have cracked. "I won't bother you again."

"Get out of here already, he doesn't want you in his life," Hans demands. Skipper fights off the strong urge to smack him. That would only make things worse, and it definitely wouldn't help his cause.

A cause which is in tatters. He sighs.

The moment he's left the habitat, the dam breaks. Tears flow and drip from his beak. He grips his beak to suppress the sound of his pathetic sobbing. Crying is utterly pointless, but he is unable to abate the swell.

He's never felt so completely humiliated, and by Hans, of all people. It adds insult to injury. Skipper hears footsteps behind him. He hastily wipes away the tears and straightens his spine in an attempt to look composed. It's Maurice. He's unlikely to have anything positive to add. Skipper speed waddles away from in vain. Maurice catches up with him on the way to his habitat.

"What was all that about?"

Skipper stares at him, at a loss for how to rationally explain the situation. Instead of anything sensible, what bursts out of his beak is not. "I had a dream about Ringtail, a few weeks ago."

Maurice looks afraid to ask. That would be wise if he didn't do it anyway. "What kind of dream, if you don't mind?"

"A romantic dream. We were holding hands, and kissing and running around. Then… then it turned into a sex dream." Skipper wishes the Earth would open up and swallow him. Why is he confessing it to someone who can run and tell Julien? Regardless, it feels good to get it off his chest.

"I would prefer if this stays between us," Skipper adds. "Uh - or else."

Maurice's eyebrows rise.

"What does that dream have to do with it?"

"I just. I want him to _want_ me, but my feelings freaked me out so much I buried my head in the sand. Now it's too late."

Maurice kicks a pebble on the ground. "That's heavy. Give him some time, some space. He's more into you than you're probably thinking, it's that puffin getting in his head."

"I hope so. Otherwise… I don't know."

* * *

**CHAPTER FOUR**

**(Julien)**

It hurts.

It aches.

He yelled at Skipper and sent him away, how could he do that? Whatever his intentions, Skipper was finally making an effort, and Julien stomped it in the dirt. Now he'll never want Julien in any capacity. Is he truly better off? He doesn't _feel_ better.

Julien falls to his knees. He squeezes his eyes shut and takes several deep, shuddering breaths. He will not cry. He will not let his misplaced affection toward Skipper control him. Hans pats and rubs his back, soothing and grounding him.

Watching Skipper leave after his dark, sour words is a gaping wound in his chest. However, he thinks it was the best thing to do for himself and his heart. Doesn't the right thing often hurt? Still, he can't believe what he did. Few things have caused him so much mental strain.

On the positive he is not alone in this. He has Hans in his corner. Meanwhile, to cool down, he would prefer to be alone. He relays this, and Hans nods, disappearing over the wall. Julien paces the habitat for a bit, takes a bath, has a smoothie, and plays a dumb game with Mort and Maurice. He sits on his throne and watches some of the animals.

Eventually he notices that Hans has returned, and he's fiddling with something behind the smoothie bar. Julien climbs down and approaches him. Hans perks at the sound of his approach. He pushes away his project and turns to him.

"Ah, my new bestie!"

"Hans… I wish that Skipper liked me. What am I doing wrong?"

Hans' expression darkens. "Forget about him, Julien. He is stuck in his ways, and he won't change. He's made up his mind about you."

Julien frowns and rubs his arm. "It is not being of da fairness."

"It's not easy, but you need to let him go from your life. You will be happier."

"If you are saying it, that is sounding reasonable," Julien says. He raises an eyebrow, though. It's a tad strange how Hans is trying so hard to get him to get rid of Skipper completely. Hans does have a point. He's just not _ready_ to let go. He thinks it might crush him.

He steers the subject in another direction. "What are you working on?"

His eyes widen as though he wasn't expecting Julien to ask about that. "Oh… never mind that silly thing! You will just find it boring, palsy-walsy."

"But -"

"Let us do something fun! How do you feel about charades?"

Distracted, Julien does a little dance. "I love charades!"

Several games later, Julien is actually tired. He throws a small dance party, but he is worn out from all the high emotions of the day. He collapses on the bouncy and murmurs to Hans, "Join me?"

Hans curls behind him. A few moments pass as Julien starts to drift off. Suddenly, there's a wing stroking his shoulder. Then, he feels the tip of a beak nudge his muzzle and another wing sneaking _between_ his legs. He jerks away and shoves Hans to the side.

"What is it you are doing to me?" He glances to see that Maurice has awoken from the noise and is watching them warily.

"Sorry Julien, my sincerest apologies. I thought you were wanting -" Hans stops. He appears sheepish in the low light.

"I am not wanting of your pity," Julien says in a borderline growl, his shoulders tensing.

"Okay, okay, again I am sorry, I did not mean to overstep."

"Do not be trying the touchy affection things again," Julien demands. Hans nods. Julien is flattered, but it is not right when his heart still belongs to someone else. Reciprocated or not, he cannot help how he feels. He can see only a friend, when he looks at Hans.

Hans sleeps on the other side of the bouncy.

In the morning, he seems to be in a bad mood. His replies are curt, and he doesn't initiate conversation. Julien's heart sinks. Has he damaged another relationship while doing nothing at all? It's so confusing.

"Hans?"

The hazel eyes dart to him. There's a cast of stormy anger in his expression, barely hidden. In that, Julien can comprehend how the penguins easily regard him as a villain. His throat is dry, and he loses his appetite for his smoothie.

"Why aren't you talking to me? What was I doing?"

"I'm sorry, it's not your fault," Hans says. "Not really. I am merely… disappointed that I keep making poor choices in potential mates."

Hans' reply guts him. He sets his smoothie down and wrings his hands.

"You… you are wanting to - to date me?"

"I thought you were different, but you're just like Skipper, playing with my heartstrings and leaving me out to dry."

Julien bangs his fist on the counter, causing Hans, and Maurice who is cleaning cups, to both jump. He proclaims, "I am not like Skipper! I am apologizing if you thought I was interested, but I never meant to give any indication of that. I'm just not for that, I - I cannot be changing it!"

"You can if you try hard enough. Don't you think I'm worthy? I'm making my best attempt here to show you, I can give you the world."

Tears escape Julien's eyes. He covers his face. "Why am I only ever upsetting and hurting people."

"King Julien, you're not -"

"Be silent and stay out of this, servant," Hans commands. Julien can't even muster the indignation at someone talking to _his_ royal advisor and best friend like that.

Maurice grumbles something unintelligible. Julien peeks to see he's left the scene. Hans sighs. There's a stretch of utter silence that weights on Julien's innards.

"I didn't mean you make you cry, my lovely King. Please. Understand. Skipper is not worth your time and heart, but together we can do - we can - ah - be amazing, together. Ja?"

"Uh - Maybe. I don't know," Julien whimpers. "I don't know. I'm sorry."

"Just think about it," Hans says. "I have things to do."

Julien waits until the scent of Hans fades. He buries his head in his arms on the counter and wails into the thick fur. The weight of something was pressed on his forearm. He screeched and fell backward.

_Fear_. With horror, he realizes he's _afraid_ of Hans. Is that normal? Is he a terrible person? It's exactly the kind of thing Hans didn't want. He would be so hurt. Bracing for impact, it takes him a moment to realize it's Maurice.

His expression is equally as terrified as Julien feels.

Julien murmurs, "I think I have been making a terrible mistake."

"What is it Julien? Why are you so jumpy?"

Julien stares at him, uncertain if he should answer. Perhaps he is similar to Skipper, and he is being paranoid and leaping at shadows. He doesn't want to alarm his royal advisor for nothing. Maurice will probably think he's being dramatic and overreacting like usual. That's the persona he's built after all. No one would regard him as earnest.

He changes the subject. "Maurice… you know it is lemur mating season now."

"Yes. Are you planning on courting Hans? I don't think -"

"Hans?! No. I am going to court Skipper."

"Skipper? Really? Didn't think things were good between you two. Are you sure you're ready for such a big step, if he goes along, that is?"

"I know we are in a bad place, but I think this is the last way I am thinking of to turn it around. I am ready."

"Well. Good luck. Actually, he might be more interested than you think."

Mostly, he wants to keep Skipper close. It will be a shocking way to open a dialogue, but it would be sure to get his attention. He could then slowly steer it toward his revelation that Hans is in fact dangerous and manipulative.

If anyone would believe him, it's Skipper. He's the safest option as well, he could protect Julien. He doesn't know Hans' plans or his endgame, but Skipper could be prepared. He only hopes practically coming onto him won't scare him too bad.

* * *

**CHAPTER FIVE**

**(Skipper)**

"Skipper!"

Skipper winces at the sound of Julien's voice just as drills end. He sends his men on their way, not wanting to make a scene in front of them. Julien marches up to him, with an expression of determination. Oddly, he's carrying an ice cream cone. Hans is nowhere in immediate sight, but that doesn't mean he isn't around.

In a strained voice, Skipper asks, "Ringtail… what's… up? Are you feeling… better?"

"I am doing… uh… great!"

There's a hesitance there. Skipper rakes his eyes over the lemur's form, checking for anything unusual. Julien snaps his fingers.

"My eyes are being up here you know. Not that I mind you checking out my handsome figure of course," Julien says. After their recent fight, his cavalier attitude is jarring. Is he over it already? Is this a bizarre front? His conceit and fickleness are legendary, but this is too much. He seemed deeply upset earlier.

His gut immediately agrees with a slight rumble - something is _very, very_ wrong with him. He's tense around the eyes, his tail isn't perky, and his posture is too stiff. His cheerful voice sounds painfully forced. He reckons only years of knowing Julien and paying close attention to him would allow him to read these subtle cues.

"I wasn't -"

"Do you want to be sharing of the ice cream cone?" Julien offers the treat in front of Skipper's beak. His eyes flick between the dessert and Julien.

"You only have one."

"Hence, of the _sharing,_ silly!"

Skipper nods. What's the harm? He laps at the sweet strawberry on one side, while his eyes follow Julien's efforts on the other. At one point their tongues nearly touch, but Julien jerks away from him with a whispered apology. Occasionally, he stops to scan the area, like he expects a group of ninjas to ambush them. Julien allows Skipper to lick out the ice cream inside the cone, then he turns the cone and pushes the bottom end to his beak. He begins to gnaw at the other end.

Skipper drawls, "You realize if we eat it like this, we'll meet in the middle?"

Julien bites his lip and doesn't answer. Skipper's gone this far, might as well keep going. Loud crunching follows as the cone is devoured. Julien rapidly chews, unable to swallow it after only one or two bites like Skipper.

Lips find beak, pressing together. Skipper slides his tongue past Julien's lips to taste him. He tastes like ice cream of course, with hints of mint and citrus. Julien makes a low sound in his throat, bringing Skipper back to reality. He pulls away.

"Uh, Ringtail, I - uh -"

"I was not expecting the tongue," Julien admits, appearing bashful, which surprises Skipper. He bounces, shifting his weight foot to foot. He appears antsy. Skipper can't imagine what's going on with him.

"That's alright. But is it okay that I - that we -"

He hears a distant shout. "Skipper! Meeting in HQ, right now!"

He and Julien share a look, then rush off in the direction of the call. Skipper drops down into the base. He can sense Julien landing behind him. Heat floods his face. Will Julien mention what just happened?

Skipper can't believe he kissed him.

Absolutely not a single soul must be allowed to know.

"Ringtail and I _didn't _kiss," Skipper proclaims to the room at large. "We were not kissing."

All penguin eyes settle on him. Kowalski and Private are puzzled, while Rico appears disturbingly intrigued.

Kowalski tentatively offers, "No one said anything about kissing -"

"Exactly!" Skipper continues while gesturing wildly, "Because no kissing has occurred!"

Skipper turns to Julien, who looks fairly alarmed and perturbed, "Right, Ringtail?"

"Uh." Julien shrugs. "Right… Sure?"

Well, _that_ was confident. His team don't appear concerned. Kowalski begins the debriefing.

"At 0800 hours, a bulk of zoo supplies were unaccounted for, despite being in stock yesterday. As of now, I haven't found a clue toward the thief."

"Archie? Blowhole? Clemson?"

"All of them check out. Archie is mending from a bad territorial fight, Blowhole is building a new lair, and Clemson is in the sick ward at Hoboken."

"Blast. Who could it be. Someone new?"

"Possibly." Kowalski pauses. "I haven't investigated Hans… but I figured you were on him."

Julien steps forward, shoving Skipper aside. "You will not be accusing him! Hans is a good person, that no one can be seeing. He didn't do this!"

Kowalski looks askance at Skipper. He shrugs.

"If Julien strongly believes he's innocent… he's been spending a lot of time with him, and it seems like Hans has opened up to him in ways not previously observed. For now, it's best to drop that line."

Kowalski tilts his head and his brow furrows. "Well… if you say so."

Julien gapes at him in shock as well. It morphs into a grin.

"Thanking you Skipper!"

"Of course."

"You were so angry and suspicious of him, I was never thinking you could side with me," Julien adds. Kowalski nods toward him in agreement with that.

Skipper grumbles, "Yes, I know."

They have a prolonged discussion about the game plan. Ultimately, for now they can only wait for a clue or a mistake. Julien is silent in observation. He's lately made Skipper feel so unbalanced. He used to know his footing with Julien.

Once the room has cleared, Julien bends to whisper, "Would you be coming to my habitat?"

Skipper almost chokes on his own saliva. He manages to nod. Julien's hand wraps around his flipper, sending tingles along the appendages. He practically drags Skipper to his living space. He gestures for Skipper to wait and hops over the wall.

After a few minutes, he pops up and waves him inside.

"We will be having the smoothie now!" Julien sets a cup in front of him at the smoothie bar, a cup with two straws. "It is my own special recipe, it doesn't have fish but I hope you are liking it. If you don't, you can be of the honesty with me, I will simply try to make it better."

Skipper blinks, processing that. He takes one of the straws in his beak and sips. His eyes widen. "Wow."

"Is it - is it being that nasty?" Julien makes to grab it, but Skipper yanks it from his reach.

"No! I should have been more - It's really good. I like it."

"Can - can you also be liking me?"

"Are we… Ringtail, are you -" Skipper inhales, deep and shaking. "I'm no good for - _to_ you. Why won't you _hate_ me?"

Skipper revealed more than he intended, but it's out now. He might actually go all the way and just confess after all. He wants to take flight and throw caution to the wind. Julien stares at him for a moment. He thoughtfully strokes the feathers at the crown of Skipper's head. He wishes Julien would stop being so tactile. It's harder to keep his cool.

With a hint of sadness, Julien replies, "Dummy penguin. It is being the opposite. I think you are the bestest and spending time with you… makes me feel good."

Admittedly, being told that is flattering. It also warms his heart. "You know, I've always considered indifference to be the opposite of love _and_ hate. The absence of passionate, intense feelings, though not necessarily of negative and positive ones."

"What is being your point?"

"I disliked you once. You rubbed me the wrong way," Skipper replies. "We've gotten along sometimes, but I could never bring myself to see you as my friend. We were always opposing forces, rarely able to find the grounds for compromise within our adversarial relationship."

"Oh, that is making me feel much better. Are you trying of da being clear you don't really like me in da real life's? You said we could start anew - then you pushed me away again so I got dat message -"

"No, it's more complex. It doesn't mean I saw you simply as an enemy, or that I continued to hate you." Skipper sighs. He tries to grapple for the correct words that won't scare him off. "The thing is I - I despised the idea of being your friend because at some point my feelings stopped being platonic. As easily as I hated - or thought I hated - you, it changed. So here it is: I don't dislike you, or just like you. Got all that Ringtail?"

He can't mention the word yet - _love_. He wants to get a grip on where he stands.

"Uh - uh - yes, silly penguin, I am getting all dat. I feel - I feel da same way about you."

"Sure. Might as well make it official while we're at it -"

"I was thinking dat was da worst day, because you can only see me as friend or enemy. I have been of da drowning in sorrows. Now dis is being da bestest day of my life!" Julien jumps and claps his hands together.

"Don't you think that's a little -"

Julien dips forward. Sensing his intention, Skipper makes himself receptive in a split second. He tilts his head as Julien kisses him. Tingles shoot through his whole body and his breathe is nearly stolen.

"- overdramatic."

"... If we are being in da honest times, I have felt dat way since da beginnings."

"Wait you - _oh_. Wow. Anyway, we can still do the friend thing - we should. Get to know each other, understand each other on a deeper level."

"And kiss each other?"

"Exactly. Great Kraken, here we are. I'm going to date you, Ringtail."

"Actually it is being courtship."

"Same thing," Skipper insists. He takes another sip. Julien follows suit, drinking from the other straw. Considering he recently had his tongue in Julien's mouth, there's no reason not to accept this.

"On Madagascar, courtship is much more serious than being dating."

"Oh. Well, potato _potaw-toe_."

"What?"

"They are spoken with different emphasis but still fundamentally the same."

"Whatever you are saying, but yes I am courting you now."

Skipper murmurs, "This is a drastic switch from your - you were furious earlier."

"Yes, and before I was - I was chasing you around the bush? The language here is strange. On Madagascar, all words are having one meaning, and we have literal descriptions when we don't have da specific word."

"That's close enough. If you mean you weren't being straightforward?" Skipper processes that. It's no wonder he mangles language. He needs to stop taking what he thinks he knows about Julien at face value.

"Yes!" Julien's palm settles on Skipper's cheek. "I did not think you would be this going along with me."

"I wouldn't have. Truth is, I was terrified. Once I saw how much you were suffering, and it seemed clearer than ever - I - I mistakenly thought you couldn't comprehend the weight of such emotion and take it seriously," Skipper admits. "I was worried you would have your fun and then move on with little to no warning or gentleness, or worse, treat it like a joke from the beginning."

Julien's expression softens. His lips engulf the tip of Skipper's beak in another burning kiss. When he pulls away, he says, "I am not being a shallowest pool for da wading."

It takes a moment for Skipper to decipher the meaning in his mangled manner of speech. "I - I would like to learn to swim with you to guide me."

"You are knowing how to swim, silly penguin," Julien replies, tilting his head. Skipper chuckles, but he calms at Julien's offended expression.

"I'm not laughing at you - you're just - you're _cute_. I was -" Skipper shakes his head. He tugs Julien in for more kisses, as he's the one at a loss for the right words.

A wretched voice breaks their bubble of happiness. "After all that I am doing for you, Julien, you go crawling back to this heartbreaker? Do not listen to him, he doesn't care about you! You are just a hot piece of ass he will use for fun and dump."

Skipper and Julien jump down from their seats. Julien stands in front of Skipper, feet firmly planted. Skipper fights the instinct to come between them and protect Julien. He wants to see Julien's reaction. He points at Hans.

"You! You are delusional. You are the one who is taking advantage and hurting others."

"I see that Skipper has been feeding to you these lies again," Hans says, his voice low and threatening. Skipper's eyes rove to spot the wagon behind him, and he recognizes some of the zoo supplies that have gone missing.

How could he miss it? Anything involving Julien tends to cloud his senses. If he was going to make this love work, he had to be more mindful around him. Romantic feelings are no reason to completely drop his guard, it wasn't healthy, and it directly caused his failures in the past.

"No, I was figuring it out myself, and I knew I could lure you out of hiding. You are of da thieving, and you are da bad guy, however you try to deny it."

"Wait," Skipper interjects. "When you defended Hans earlier… that was a cover? But… the courtship thing, that's real, right?"

Julien doesn't take his gaze off Hans when he replies, "Of course we are courting for da real life. I didn't know if he was spying, if he knew I was suspicious he would avoid me."

"That's - that's clever, Julien. I'm impressed."

Julien's attention is pulled to him. His eyes widen, and they seem to twinkle. He folds his hands and fights a smile. "You are meaning that?"

Hans takes out a laser and points it at Julien. "Enough of this farce."

Skipper shouts, but Julien is slow to react, probably still distracted by Skipper's compliment. Skipper has no choice but to push him out of the way. The laser glances his flipper, and he grunts at the pain. There's a sensation of blood drizzling from his wound. Julien makes a low sound, which Skipper has never heard from him.

He leaps onto Hans and sinks his teeth into his neck. His nails viciously dig into the puffin's sides and scratch him. Skipper knows that Julien has fight in him, but he depends on more defensive and agility based styles unless he's enraged. Seeing this kind of violent direct attack from someone usually friendly and passive momentarily unsettles him. He must be immersed in fury to act against his normal nature.

"Julien, don't!" Skipper rushes to them. Hans kicks Julien off, and Skipper sees streaks of blood where he was bitten before Hans targets Skipper.

Julien is quickly at his side. However, Skipper is able to collapse against him with relief when the other penguins appear. He would've fought through the pain if necessary, but it's pleasant to just give in. Rico, Kowalski, and Private have no problem taking out Hans due to him being ruled by emotion and injured. They detain him.

Julien keeps an arm wrapped around Skipper's back and under his good flipper as he walks him to the base. There, Kowalski patches him up with Julien closely hovering nearby. He keeps pestering Kowalski with questions, especially centered around whether Skipper is at risk for infections or rabies. He misunderstands how these things work; nonetheless, Skipper is touched by his concern.

He must be making obvious adoring eyes at Julien, because Kowalski asks, "If I may - er - is something going on with you two? Your comment earlier - when you said you weren't kissing - did you actually -"

"Yes."

"Yes, what?"

"We're dating - I mean, Julien and I are _courting_ which is more serious in his world. Take it or leave it, I don't care."

Julien says, "I thought you would be wanting to hide it…"

"Why? I'm proud that you somehow want _me_. Julien loves Skipper, and Skipper loves Julien, let's sing it from the rooftops, Ringtail."

Finally breaking new ground has made him overtly sentimental. With the adoring way Julien looks at him, he's not remotely ashamed.

Julien murmurs with a catch in his breath, "Skipper…"

Their gazes lock. The world seems to diminish to Julien and Skipper, revelling in the moment. Naturally, it can't last, and is broken by another penguin's incredulous snort.

"Disgusting," Kowalski remarks with a grimace. "No offense, it's just, Julien isn't the most - and you're - and it's - it would be like watching my parents make out and stuff, as an old married couple. I mean you two fight like it, so I can't say I'm shocked."

Private comments, "Oh Kowalski, I think it's just so sweet! I'm happy for you two, and seeing you happy together warms the heart. Instead of hating on each other all the time and driving everyone mental, you're _in love_! I was telling Marlene the other day, I really hoped you would figure it out and start dating."

Skipper and Julien blink at him. Skipper is baffled. He wouldn't have expected Private to have this strong investment in the nature of their relationship.

Rico questions, "You mate wit' 'im?"

Skipper's beak drops open as he furiously blushes. He chokes on his words a little as he protests, "Rico, get your mind out of the - we haven't _yet_ \- this _just_ started."

Rico's expression suggests he doesn't get why they haven't already slept together, but Skipper doesn't push the issue. To each their own. He would prefer to take it slow with Julien, as he isn't just some frolic.

"Excusing me," Julien says in an injured tone. "What is he meaning by _mate_? Isn't that being another word for having someone that you court? Aren't we being dat?"

"I -" Skipper stares at him. "He's talking about physical intimacy. You know."

"Sexual intercourse," Kowalski helpfully provides. "The horizontal tango, banging, bam-bam in the ham -"

Rico covers Private's ears, but it's probably too late at this point. Kowalski continues despite Skipper's deadly glare. Julien narrows his eyes and falls silent as Kowalski rambles on.

"Bedroom rodeo, boning, churning the butter, dancing in the sheets, jumping in the sack, dipping the wick, doing it, the deed, or the nasty, sowing your seed, ploughing the fields, entering the castle, fishing for kippers -"

Julien is gawking at him by about four phrases in, like a devout Priest would look at someone shamelessly blaspheming in the middle of the church. It would be comical, if Skipper's skin wasn't crawling. Skipper kind of wants to strangle Kowalski at this point.

Skipper attempts, "Where did you even hear some of those, Kowalski? Will you just -"

Kowalski ignores and talks over him with no regard. "Frickle-frackle, funny business, getting busy, getting it on, getting laid, going all the way, hanky panky, having relations -"

Julien makes a noise, like he's the one being strangled.

Skipper attempts to shut him up with force, but Kowalski evades him. "Why do you know so many of these?!"

"Trivia."

"But why would that ever -"

Kowalski goes on, "Anything ringing a bell my Malagasy friend? Hitting a home run? Rolling in the hay? Jumping each other's bones? Do it like they do on the discovery channel? Making love? Making whoopee?"

Skipper is at his limit. He finally is able to tackle Kowalski. "For the love of all the fish in the ocean, will you put a cork in it, man? Can't you see you're freaking him out?"

Julien is standing ramrod straight. It looks like he saw something completely unbelievable, like his father's ghost and his clone having an epic lightsaber battle on the moon.

Sometimes, Skipper's imagination runs away with him. He blames it on all the science fiction Kowalski watches on TV just to criticize the material.

Kowalski squints. He is not one to consider emotions first. "Oh. Sorry."

"Skipper," Julien tentatively calls to him. Skipper lets Kowalski out of his grip, sparing his feeble neck for the moment. "What is da smarty penguin - what is he - I don't - I'm not being of da getting of it."

Julien struggles with the words and gives up after a minute. Skipper returns to glaring at Kowalski. For his part, Kowalski backs away, holding up his flippers in surrender.

"You broke him."

"It's not my fault he's - like - super virginal or something? Why does everyone accuse me of breaking people! I'm innocent!"

Julien remarks, "I am being of da _what_, Kowalski? Take that back!"

"Don't worry about it. There's nothing wrong with you," Skipper reassures him. He takes Julien's hand. "Let's be off, so we can be… alone."

"Oh, gross, I didn't need to hear that," Kowalski says and heads toward his lab.

Skipper rebukes, "You were the one naming euphemisms for getting one's freak on!"

Skipper ignores Kowalski's distant whining. He bids a good evening to the other two, leaving with Julien for a quieter and less intrusive place.

On their walk to Julien's habitat, Julien is able to find his ability to function.

"He is talking about what they do in da mating season?"

"Uh, well, it's not always contained to a season, but essentially."

"I am only knowing it is part of the ceremony that will have the Sky Spirits be gifting of da babies. It's like - ah, they are using of da No-No-Touchy places that are different for da males and females, and putting them with each other."

That's a doozy. Skipper does his level best not to express amusement at Julien's expense. It's blatantly clear his education was lacking on a severe level that Skipper had not realized.

"Uh, something like that. I mean, touching is alright between consenting adults." Skipper elaborates, "If you and your partner both want it, you can express your affections to each other more intensely this way. It's not for everyone though, and that's okay too. It's not a requirement."

"I know you said it was being too soon… but can you make with da showing of me? I want to know if I would be liking it, and I am feeling most secure with you," Julien says.

Skipper's lower belly fills with warmth. He's astounded and thankful that Kowalski's blithe chatter and their recent awkward conversation hasn't put him off the idea. Rather, it seems to have motivated him for some reason.

"If that's what you want, Ringtail. I'd be happy to do that with you."

So much for going slow. Perhaps, it's better that they get to this, and it will ease the rest along. In any case, he's not about to complain. Mating or no mating, Skipper loves _who he is_, and he'll have to show him that in their budding relationship.

"Usually my not knowing these things is scaring my partners away… I am being scaredy and of da hesitating, and they are getting impatient."

"I guess I'm made of tougher stuff."

"Your stuffings are also very soft." Julien rubs his flipper between his hands. "Will your hurty flipper be okay for doing this?"

"I'll be careful with it, should be fine."

* * *

**CHAPTER SIX**

**(Julien)**

Julien is tied in many knots. He's actually going to mate with Skipper, or some resemblance to it. He's never been able to go through with it, the way those in a relationship with him in the past behaved was always turning him off.

Julien leads Skipper to the shed attached to his habitat. It's rarely used, but he flips a sign out on the door. Maurice will know to not disturb him or let anyone else disturb him. Inside, a hammock is stretched across the middle. There's candles, pillows, a bucket, and other random junk he's borrowed from other animals laying around.

"Dis is my love hammock!" Julien interlocks his own fingers inward. "I have not been using it yet. None of the zoo animals were wanting to be courted."

"Except for me."

Julien smiles. He swings himself onto the hammock. He reaches for Skipper, assisting in getting him up, though he has no doubt Skipper could've done it on his own. Skipper's beak meets his lips. Skipper cups the back of his head as they slowly kiss and explore. Julien takes the step this time to join their tongues in the kiss. Skipper leans back and stares at him.

"What about my features is being distracting you?" Julien paws at his face, checking for what has caught Skipper's gaze.

"I'm just looking at _you_ and wondering how I could be so blind."

Julien's eyes widen. "I did not know you weren't being with sight! I -"

"Ringtail! It's an expression."

"Oh. It is meaning what now?"

"That I somehow denied myself from being _with_ you, with you, for all this time. That I didn't allow myself to see how amazing you are."

Julien flushes, equally pleased and embarrassed by the explanation. He cups Skipper's cheeks and kisses him hard. They resume kissing, only parting after a while to catch their breath. Skipper's aims turn lower.

Skipper parts his legs and slides close. Julien's stomach plummets in a good yet scary way, and he is covered in tingles. Skipper's actions and expression remind him of what initiated them moving to this secluded place.

He lowers his beak. "I'm not greatly versed in mammal biology but… hmm, you're well endowed, huh?"

Julien peers down at himself. He'd heard of others comparing their assets, of course, though he never understood the point. Something about impressing those they wished to date. He never much cared before, but now he is happy that his parts are good enough for Skipper.

"Ah - I - am I?"

"I suppose. Not that it really matters," Skipper says he slides his flippers along Julien's sides. He squirms and arches, bathing in his attention. He's unable to control his reaction. He feels heat travelling to his nether region.

Skipper nips at his ears, tugging on them. He makes his way under Julien's chin, to his neck. He nips at first, but Julien says, "Don't do that."

When he licks, that feels much better. He wraps his fingers around the strands of the hammock and gasps. Soon, Skipper is pushing his buttons in all the right ways. Julien reciprocates. He discovers that stroking under his flippers pulls noises from him, and touching his tail feathers makes him particularly wriggly.

Heat increases. Julien has swelled between his legs, and it aches up through to his chest, causing heavy breathing. Skipper has licked his way down Julien's stomach, but he pauses before going further.

He crawls up to kiss Julien. It's sloppier, both of them overcome with their desires. Julien experiences pressure from Skippers weight on his area, and he whines. Skipper seems to notice and shifts his position. Julien shivers when his flipper wraps around his member and strokes him. He moans and sinks his fingers into Skipper's feathers.

"I've never thought anything could feel so good," he murmurs, his voice gravelly to his ears. Skipper hums.

"I'm only getting started, sweetheart." Skipper's expression is gravely serious for a moment. "It's an honor to have your trust. Know that I will do everything in my power to not betray it."

"I'm sorry I let Hans convince me you were the bad guy… maybe I _am_ stupid…"

"You're far from stupid, Ringtail. He played mind games and used your kindness and your naivete against you, none of that is purely your fault. If anything… if I had tried harder to be a good friend to you, he wouldn't have - plus he wasn't entirely wrong. I mishandled our rocky relationship."

"Let us be forgetting that and moving on," Julien remarks.

"That's wise. I hope together we can get on more even footing… not that I would mind the bickering," Skipper confesses.

"Yes, we can be keeping that. It's very exciting! No one is challenging me like you."

"Same."

Things continue to escalate with them touching each other to the point of climax. The best comparison Julien could make is a fireworks finale meeting a swell of emotions - such as the tears that escape without one's bidding. He didn't know it was possible to be so happy and satisfied to the point he feels it in his bones.

Afterward, Skipper uses the spigot in the corner to put water in a bucket, and a rag to clean the sticky mess they made. Julien watches him. He won't leave now, will he? He tells himself Hans was wrong, there's no way it could be right after things Skipper said.

Then again, he _did_ fall for what Hans said. It seemed real, and it wasn't.

To his relief, Skipper hops back on the hammock after putting stuff away. They giggle as the momentum causes them to swing side to side. He clings to Skipper and curls around him.

"Will you stay the night? I am having good sleep when you are with me."

"When did we - oh right, the eclipse. Yeah that was… an experience." Skipper nuzzles into his fur. "I think I could be alright, getting accustomed to softness."

A purr builds in Julien's chest. He watches Skipper fall asleep, a smile resting on his beak. His heart is filled with warmth and joy as he follows.


End file.
